I wonder if it started this way for you, the path to waking up.
To realizing that there was something more waiting for you than what you had been told, or seen, or believed.
To seeing a glimmer of light in a crack of your life, creating an opening into your womanhood.
Perhaps you started to get a little bit restless, like you no longer felt truly at home in your life the way you once did.
You started to itch a little.
Not physically, but like an itch deep within your cells that you couldn’t name or get a handle on.
Restlessness is the first sign. A sign of an awakening that is coming.
It’s often followed by seeking. Seeking out something to stop the unsettledness that you feel.
It may be a positive seeking: seeking out spiritual guidance, maybe a yoga or meditation teacher, a good coach, a therapist, the right book. You may find solace on your mat, in an art class, or in a women’s circle.
Or it can be less positive seeking. Distractions like shopping, drinking, sex, working too much, food or other indulgences often reached for to dull the sharpness of the ache you have started to feel. To take the edge off the newfound awareness.
To put you back to sleep, just a little, because you’re not quite ready to wake up fully.
But still, you feel it.
It is the start of your heroine’s journey.
There will be much journeying to do, and the path can seem arduously long as you traverse its heights, depths and winding rocky paths. It is not a journey for the faint of heart, the meek or the uninquiring.
But it is worth taking that first step past the restlessness.
To even acknowledge the restlessness in the first place.
And to sit in the discomfort of it until you are ready to move through to the next stage of the path.